How to Bake a Potato
How a Honda employee bakes a potato:
· Preheat new, high-quality oven to 350 F.
· Insert Idaho potato.
· Go do something productive for 45 minutes.
· Check for doneness.
· Then remove perfectly baked potato from oven and serve.
How a GM employee bakes a potato:
· Instruct an Idaho potato supplier to preheat the oven to 350 F.
· Demand that the supplier show you how he turned the dial to reach 350F, and have him come up with documentation from the oven manufacturer proving that it was calibrated properly.
· Review documentation, then have supplier check the temperature using sophisticated temperature probe.
· Direct supplier to insert potato and set timer for 45 minutes.
· Have supplier open oven to prove potato has been installed correctly, and request a free study proving that 45 minutes is the ideal time to bake a potato of this size.
· Check potato for doneness after 10 minutes.
· Check potato for doneness after 11 minutes.
· Check potato for doneness after 12 minutes.
· Become impatient with supplier (why is this simple potato taking so
· long to bake?).
· Demand status reports every five minutes.
· Check potato for doneness after 15 minutes…
· After 35 minutes, conclude that potato is nearing completion. Congratulate supplier, and then update your boss on all the great work you’ve done, despite having to work with such an uncooperative supplier.
· Remove potato from oven after 40 minutes of baking, as a cost savings; without loss of function or quality versus the original 45 minute baking time.
· Serve potato.
· Wonder aloud what on earth those Japanese folks are doing over there to make such good low-cost baked potatoes that people seem to like better than GM potatoes.
Daimler Chrysler’s Baked Potatoes:
· Design great looking potato.
· Include sour cream, bacon bits, chives and cheese.
· Bean counters then create MCM system.
· Engineers spend 2 years looking for ways to take out sour cream, bacon bits, chives, and cheese.
· Engineers find cheap imitation chives from Japanese supplier.
· Management commands engineers to use expensive, over-engineered German bacon bits to help prop up weak German suppliers.
· Sell potato with cheap imitation chives, no sour cream, cheese or expensive German bacon bits.
· Potato rots so fast customer swears never to buy another DCX potato.
Ford’s Baked Potatoes:
· Engineers create plain looking, “everyman” potato.
· Sold as “green” alternative to French Fries.
· When micro waved, potato explodes, causing death and injury to customers and bringing end to 100-year potato and butter-supplier relationship,……………Lawyers flourish 😉