Locks of Love - Donate Hair

 

Kindness as thin as hair - Giant leap for mankind 

Do you sometimes sit and wonder, how could I make a difference ?? How one small act of mine could bring a smile on a sad face ? I am no self-sacrificer, still what can I do which will not make me poor but still brighten someone else’s life ?

Lets change the questions ? How often do you go for a haircut ? Are the bits and strands of the hair you just disowned, really “Useless” ???

The answer is “NO”. Because that hair can be used by a cancer institute for hair rejuvenation of Chemo or leukemia patients. 3″ to 10″ inches of hair that you donate can bring a cheek-to-cheek smile on an ailing patient’ face. What does it ask of you ?? Registration with a cancer institute and 3 less trips to the hair salon. FAIR DEAL !!!

I am pledged to do it !!! Will you ??

Register:

http://www.dfci.harvard.edu/bou/how/

http://www.locksoflove.org/

 

BBBS – Season II goes off air

Big Brother Big Sister (BBBS – Season II ends) 

Yet another year of mentoring and learning …..of talking and listening…..of fun and exuberance……comes to an end. The school year 2006-07 BBBS sessions came to an end today. From September 06 to June 07, every Wednesday lunch hour has been a heartwarming activity. From pot painting to frame making, bird house decoration to water ball games, UNO to Operation, discussing exams to babbling about vacations….Season II has been a wonderful experience too.

           

My two Littles – Whitney and Cherri have been just adorable. Both personalities, quite contradictory, have given me a reason to smile always. Whitney’s fashion styles and Cherri’s boogie vogue both have been a pleasure to witness. Interactions with not only my own littles but also other kids viz, Shallante, Tony, Thomas, James and with Carlotta (onsite BBBS coordinator) and other Bigs…..everyone have been delightful. 

What started as a constructive activity to consume my spare time has given me a déjà vu experience……reliving my own childhood fancies and pranks. Looking forward to Season – III.

 

BBBS is back

Big Brother Big Sister mentorship program is back for the next school term. This term I shall be mentoring two sweet teens.

Schools in US started for this academic year in September. So did the activities in the Big Brothers Big Sisters organization. Last term, when I volunteered for this, we started in March which hardly gave us ten BBBS sessions till June to interact with the little. This year they started off pretty early. I wasn’t interviewed for the credentials this time. Just a casual email asking my willingness to volunteer for this term and my assurance of agreement was the only formality. This term we’ll be meeting for lunch on Wednesdays instead of Fridays. Kenisha has already moved to Virginia with her family. So I was looking forward to a new match this time.

Our first meeting was Nov 15, 2006. The first ones are always the ice breaker sessions. I was matched with Whitney a 13 year old 8^th grader. After initial greetings in the school library, all big-little pairs were asked to assemble in the two allotted rooms for further activities. Whitney started telling me about her family. They are six siblings in total- three sisters and three brothers. The eldest is 16 year old sister with whom Whitney gets along pretty well. After two brothers is she followed by her younger twin Brittany and then a younger brother. Brittany happens to be in the same school and also in the BBBS program. Whitney has three dogs. One of them is called Midnight (endorsed by its pitch dark color). Our chatting hadn’t transpired for long when Carl, the organizer of the program, came to me with another young girl, Cherri. Experience in an area overrides the age. Being a returning mentor, I have been matched with two Littles – Whitney and Cherri.  

At the same age and still in the personality molding stage, the two girls are so different. Whitney seems to be a very well composed and reserved girl who chooses to open up only when she is very comfortable with the conversationalist. Cherri on the other hand is a very spontaneous, ardently impetuous and outgoing girl. W thinks a lot to be very certain before she describes her favorites – candy, drink, cartoons, games etc. C just blurts it out at the spur of the moment believing that these passions of hers would anyways change with time. W talks about the boys she likes in hushed tones while C unhesitatingly has all exhilarating tales to reveal. C becomes so impatient when W takes even a moment’s pause during talks. Cherri has one elder brother and sister. She is the youngest and enjoys the luxury of being the pampered one. 

I started volunteering for this program as a service for the society and the underprivileged. But when I ponder back, these community services indirectly provide so many returns mainly in terms of personal growth. BBBS this term would probably help me learn how to manage in harmony two conflicting personalities within a limited time frame. Nice mentoring session for me too J

 

Khushi and Kenisha – Epilogue

Last day… … the memorable one  

Today was our last association together. The term ends and so do the sessions. Their school closes for the term end and shall now commence in September. From this point onwards we can still maintain contact via email and phone but meeting face-to-face would be abstinent. Our meeting out of work/school requires more level of permissions and community based background checks. Even my willingness to go through that cannot make it feasible. ( to know the reason, read further.) 

One last time for BBBS, I drove to the HQ building from where a bunch of us volunteers boarded the shuttle to embark towards the school. Students were also assembling in the routine class room. Farewell day, BBBS served us pizza and tropical juice for our appetite. They also gave us our snaps they clicked last time for memoirs and a certificate of "Volunteer" appreciation to the "Bigs" and a Company back-pack to all the "Littles".  

Our activity today was beads jewelry and games. So we got the beads and chess as a reserve. We were eating pizza and she was telling me all about her school exams, how her term ended, her friends, her plans for going to the theme park at Cedar Point and her summer. We started with making the bead bracelets. I pretended that I was new to the art and Kenisha so joyfully offered to teach me. She made one for me while guiding me on how could I make for her. Then followed the necklace crafting. This time when I was designing it, she sat in amazement wondering and exclaiming that I am a fast learner ;). She presented me with her creations. These two handcrafted pieces are now my cherished gifts. When I gave her the ones I made for her, she said ……..I don't like them…………I love them See…..She knows how to give immense joy.     

She also broke the news that she is moving to Virginia for good along with her family. So that implies that I wouldn't be re-associated with her for the next term even if I continue to volunteer for BBBS. I couldn’t get her a parting gift. We were not allowed to, so as to maintain consistency and avoid disappointment for those Littles whose Bigs didn't. Not even a card. :(   

All good things come to an end so that they can give way to new ones. Kenisha is moving for good to Virginia. Her brother-in-law got a job there and moved there two months back. Now her sister, brother and herself have wrapped things up here in Michigan and are U-Hauling to
Virginia around 20^th of this month. She'll be going to the 8^th grade there.    

Every moment I captured from this short term has imbibed prints in my heart. I don’t know how much she was able to benefit from our association, but somewhere down deep, I definitely changed. And I credit her for all that change. In this world, while juggling between work and life, we burn the bridges down with the childhood innocence, kind selfless gestures, soothing smiles and heart felt greetings. This association helped me resurrect those back into my life hence facilitating the birth of a new "me".   

 

Khushi and Kenisha – last but one

Our Second last rendezvous for the term…..…..K&K playing with M&Ms 

The organization BBBS emailed us the agenda they planned for us for this week. They had a Maths activity planned. A Ford employee had volunteered to implement his idea of teaching the kids mathematics using M&Ms. Oh yeah… I am referring the chocolates here.  

So they got some mini packs and distributed a packet each amongst the Big-Little pairs. The task for the little was to count all M&Ms grouped by colors and then add them up to find the total. He then asked each one of us the totals and also the color individuals. Noteworthy, according to him, was the fact that none of the counts matched. Some packs had 19 M&Ms while some others had 23. Some had 8 reds or browns while others had none of that color. The whole idea behind this exercise was to tell the students that you could make a graph of random probability. I have to admit, it wasn't that interesting. So I wasn't expressionless when Kenisha pecked at my shoulder to say that the other "Big" (the volunteer lady sharing our table space along with her little ) says that the guy is a big Bore. The only suggestion I could offer Kenisha then was that you should respect everyone who is teaching you something (who knows someday you might get a chance to appreciate it.).  I just hope she understands it….in time.

After the exercise we got to eat more M&Ms and then we got our picture clicked together for the frame we designed. I might be able to get a digital copy for my blog.

So I am eagerly awaiting this coming session. There's some nostalgia too. Its our last meeting for the term. The possibility of us getting matched together as a "big-little" pair next year ? hmmmmmmmm…… may be may be not. As for now, this coming summer, I'll miss looking forward to our lunch hour every friday.   

 

Photo frame designing with Kenisha

Due to the bad unforeseen weather conditions, Ruddiman Middle school declared half day off for the students last week. So our BBBS session was cancelled. I guess I wasn't the only person who missed that one hour of fun and affability.  Hence, the reason that this week's assemble was looked for with an added anticipation.

Last Friday, May 12 had Mother's day the following Sunday. So the activity BBBS had planned for us at the school was a bit of Art and Craft involving designing and decorating a photo frame for Moms. In event of the day loss then, they somehow rescheduled the same activity for May 19.  

We met there at the regular time and after greetings, I asked Kenisha about her Maths homework. She showed me that they were working on some pythagorus theorem problems. So I taught her the right angled triangle, hypotenuse and the Pythagorean theorem. She was having hard time with their pronunciations so we came up with the cut outs.  

HYPOTENUSE   = HY-POTE-NUSE = Hi – Pauty – News

PYTHAGOREAN = PY-THA-GO-REAN = Pie - Tha –Go - Reeean 

It doesn’t read that funny, but it was hilarious when our neighbors started giggling at our practice session.  

I wanted to keep the class short so that she isn’t really bored out of it. So after the brief train-how and signing the BBBS attendance sheet, we started our craft work. Finding out stickers and animal and flower cut outs for the decoration was fun. We both had many common picks that we decided upon. I knew Kenisha would feel a bit bad about the whole design being for the Mother's day thing, so I suggested that she could design something for her sister or her best friend and at that she said I want to make it for "US". It left me dumbstruck in awe for a while.  

With a theme of Dolphins and hearts, we decorated the frame with a calligraphic write-up of "Best-Buds" and our initials. The frame is a master-piece for me, not only for some exceptionally beautiful work, but for the fact that it's our first creative activity wrapped with fun and feelings. ;)   

Also after today's meeting, I know that of all things in me, she loves my hair the most and likes that I know some maths. Hehehhehehe ……… We would have just started and sooner than we knew, the hour had already past by. I am reminded of the theory of relativity by Einstein.

 (Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT’S relativity. -Albert Einstein) 

Last time, when we were playing the game "Connect Four", a win seemed very easy for me in the various rounds, but for the first time, for a 13 yr old angel, I wanted to lose. I was more than willing to accept a failure. Just to see that smile on her face, the sense of accomplishment with a twinkle in her eye.  

That was when I felt that so many people around you could unknowingly bring that unprecedented transformation in you and bring out that side of you which you yourself are unaware of. 

Next week their school is again closed and so there wont be any BBBS session. Now we next meet June 2nd.    

 

Khushi and Kenisha – III

Our third meeting together!!

A long break (almost a month) during which we both went through a couple of crests and troughs, joys and tough times, code reviews and exams, friend get-togethers and family vacations.

Kenisha had her exams and spring break vacation. She didn’t really talk much about her exams but yes was enthusiastic about the time she spent with her brother and her sister's family. Her eldest sister fills the void her mother's expiry caused in her life a couple of years ago.  Her best recalled moments are the ones she spent with her mother. And undoubtedly, if Fairy God mother comes to grant her a wish, all she desires is her mother back.

Now we are not strangers. We are not just acquaintances. We have evolved a step further.

This meeting of ours we signed a paper agreement to abide by the regulations of "BBBS" which prohibits us to meet outside the school premises. We can still be in touch via emails and phone. I had a "Bring children to work" day at my work on April 27^th. How much I wished I could have brought Kenisha along. But these regulations……yeah I know these were made keeping many things in mind and for the betterment of the program. But that’s the way it goes…….it would have been so good for Kenisha and it would have given us another sense of belonging.  Ahh anyways!!

So this time we had board games at hand to play. She had already eaten her lunch, so I pushed mine aside for later. We had full time to play and study. We played Pick-Up sticks, Doctor/Specialist board game and Connect Four. Then she showed me what she is doing in Maths these days. She hates mathematics and I love it. Perfect contrast :p

Number line additions and subtractions……it seems like a kid play now. I am sure I would have freaked out on that crookedly straight number line once or twice at-least when I was that age.   And today I sat there, winking at those same numbers.

A couple of new things I learnt about her today. Her full name (including the middle), her nick and yes of course, our only outside-school contact…..her email address!!

 

Second rendezvous - Khushi ‘n Kenisha

my second day with Kenisha:

Second rendevous…..
No goose bumps and no nervousness. Actually I was eagerly looking forward to lunch time with anticipation of meeting her as well as quenching my hunger with the tasty Biryani courtesy a friend (I am lucky for having friends after all not everyone gets a packed delicacy lunch ). When the "Big" team reached Ruddiman School, the "Littles" weren't yet done with their class. It took them a couple of minutes to reach the designated area.

Me and Kenisha still had a little incomplete questionairre about our likes/dislikes from last time…so we did that and exchanged the papers before we started today's exercise. BBBS people had another activity planned for this second visit too. Actually a game which could help the kid's mathematical skills grow. Our activity was a set of three games of probability. The first one was a toss of a single coin, and finding the expected versus the gained outcomes. Second was an extension to the first one….toss of two coins. For both these games, I taught her the concepts of theoretical probability. Then we wrote down the expected outcomes and probability of either of us being the winner and then we actually tossed the coins. And I gladly lost the chance game to the cute kid.

The third game was : Rock, paper and scissors. I don't really remember playing this game in India when I was a kid. But its real fun. Paper defeats a rock, a pair of scissors defeats a paper and rock defeats a pair of scissors. A circle goes on. The gist being that no one choice could actually be a winner always made this game quite fair.

Kenisha doesnt really like maths and when i question her regarding that, she very innocently says "oh i forget"……once and twice….the third time……i was "Cmmon Kenisha……you havent forgotten this …. think …i am waiting" and guess what she hadnt really forgotten.

Children back in India are exposed to formulae, prohibited use of calculators and higher levels of mathematics at quite an early age as compared to kids here. No wonder the intellectual disparity in problem solving.

I learnt two more passions that Kenisha possesses. Hair do (the african american brait making)  and  Dancing (heel-toe). And I must say she is very good at both. I was touched when she actually got a model face on which she is practising the braits to school on friday just to show it to me and she did it superbly. If some day I plan to get them done on my hair, she would unreluctantly be my first choice

Next three weeks, their school is off for spring break. So now I shall be seeing her next on May 5.

An introduction at first is now a bond because of the second

P.S. — By the way … did you know that Ruddiman Middle School was named for "Edsel Ruddiman," Henry Ford's best friend? In fact, Henry named his son, Edsel Ford I, for his good friend. And great-grandson and Ford Motor Company board member Edsel Ford II was named for his grandfather!

 

“Big-Little”

"Big-Little" relationship — "My first day"

Last Friday was our first session for BBBS. I drove to my company's headquarters and from there the bunch of mentor volunteers with their Brown lunch bags started their journey to Ruddiman Middle School in company's shuttle. After a couple of minutes drive and a bit getting lost in the neighborhood, we entered the school's rear parking lot. If you ask me how I felt…..I was having goose bumps. But so were the others – nervous and apprehensive and considering the fact that most of them were already parents to 2-3 10-20 year olds, I was doing great.   

We assembled in the school's auditorium. It was quite nostalgic….entering a school's auditorium after almost 8 years and fitting in those tiny winy chairs. I was taken aback to my own school days. After a brief introduction about Big Brothers Big Sisters Foundation and a brief up about ourselves, we were introduced to our "Little" (oh did I tell you for the first time I am the "Big"…..I am the youngest of the siblings in my family and so have always been the "Little" ).  

For the rest of the school season, my little is a cute 13 year old African-American girl named Kenisha. A 7^th grader, Kenisha shared my nervousness and the enthusiasm too for this "Big-Little" relationship. She is the 8^th of 11 children. Unfortunately lost her mother and now lives with her sister. Has a pet dog named Oscar and loved watching the movie "Love don't cost a thing." She likes Art and literature and hates math (unlike me) except that she likes Algebra for the solving equations part only ;).  When she was in the second grade she had an Indian friend and does want to visit
India someday.  

Ice breaker: BBSS organized a small activity where we had to grab some pieces of toilet paper out of the role. Kenisha liked the number 3 so I took 3 sheets each for both of us. Some of the volunteers took 10-11 too. This was the place where more wasn’t that good The game was that u had to share with everybody N things about you where N was the number of sheets. It was fun when people started telling their zodiacs and even the day of the week they were born. We had our lunch together and I also offered her some Upma I made and she seemed to like it  

Being the introductory session, time we got with our Little was short. So looking forward to next Friday and yes!! Without any apprehensions .  

 

I’ll be a mentor soon

Accepted in BBBS mentorship 

A few days back I wrote about my idea of volunteering as a mentor for a school student via Big Brothers Big Sisters. They interviewed me for my abilities and aptitude. Also they wanted to frame out my personality traits and hobbies so that if they deem me fit, they can find the most suitable student match.  They also called for my referrals and which included my manager, a colleague and a friend.

Today, I have been congratulated to be chosen among the few who'll be volunteering in the program. I was glad to see their email but when the news actually sank in, it ran a chill down my spine. The same nerve…….Believe me I am really very excited about it and am looking forward to it. But inside somewhere I am very apprehensive about it…….what would the kid be like, would we be able to relate with each other. Would I be able to understand him/her fully and guide accordingly. What if this …what if that………..oooooooh. Its the anxiety and an unforeseen expectation.

Not fully though, but still I guess today i know what first timer to-be parents go through…..hehehhe

 

Community Service @ Karmanos Cancer Instt.

A few months ago I worked as a volunteer for a fund raising event for Karmanos Cancer Institute . It is headquartered in the same vicinity as my graduate school in
Michigan. The day had an early start and I spent about 12 hours at the event that Saturday. We were to sell tickets at a Harley Davidson Fest at
Sterling Heights area in MI. It was around an hour’s drive from my place and to wake up early in itself was a sacrifice ;).  
  

It was so much fun. Seeing about 1200 customized Harley Davidson bikes all in one stretch of land. The pompous owners of the bulky trendy bikes bragged and exhibited their bikes with pride. One had a whole cozy dog house set up as a passenger seat and had a cute dog snuggled in it in comfort. Another one had a full bass speaker system set up. Yet another one had it all painted in rainbow colors (looked somewhat weird though ).
  

A day well spent it was. I made so many new friends (Two of them happened to be my coworkers at Ford who worked in the same building and to whom I never actually got introduced to at work). I got to meet so many country side people, see their etiquette, charms, dressing styles, their somewhat atypical language….so sundry yet similar. All had that vivid passion for motor cycles especially the HD’sons.
  

My overall experience for this community service was too exuberant and amusing. This being my birthday month and I still on their records, yesterday I got official birthday greetings from The Cancer Institute.
  

Can’t find the words to tell you,
Don’t quite know what to say-
This world is so much brighter
‘Cause you’re in it every day!

 

 But though mere words may fail us,
We hope this thought comes through-
We wish the best birthday of all
To a great volunteer-that’s you! 

– Karmanos Cancer Institute 

They made my day then.
They made my day once again    

 

 

BBBS - Big Brother and Big Sister

Today I attended an orientation for BBBS. It is a bunch of people together who volunteer to act as mentors for young kids. Its like You are the BIG B and the other one is a Little one who (if you are worth it ) might start treating u as his/her role model. As i watched the video where in they showed various matches of mentor and students, i sat back to reflect that what could I actually teach that kid. I have always enjoyed the independence and freedom of my thoughts and actions…..still abiding the responsibilities and trust my elders had in me…..but actually when I sit face to face to that little mind….full of confusions and dilemma's of life (some of which are still unanswered for me), what words would actually spill out of my mouth. That little kid could actually be following me, my thoughts and my actions…….Just so that he follows the right thing……it would actually be my moral responsibility to BE right………So in the process I guess, I would grow………

So when they asked me that how the orientation was and if I would be willing to volunteer….I could just utter the words ……. "Looking forward to this opportunity to grow together"…….with someone naive and innocent…….to reread the lesson of life……to catch up on something which i might have missed when i passed through that phase. "